Each new day, we all have the chance to start over.

That’s a powerful thought! Most days, we let that opportunity slip by. Imagine the freedom of actually wiping the slate clean of all the negatives in our lives and instead focusing only on the positives in our lives. It’s a powerful and liberating realization and a gift from our Creator.

This opportunity is offered to all men …everywhere. It makes us connected in a very basic way. Sometimes, this “gift” is forgotten or dismissed. Yet, it might be the most meaningful thing we receive. It is often difficult to unwrap a new beginning and start fresh because it brings memories and situations that might be painful and scary. We all struggle with the unknown.

Maybe a loved one has died or has been diagnosed with an illness. We might even be the one who is ill and we feel frightened and alone. Perhaps, we have lost a job or our home and we are uncertain of our family’s security. Sometimes, there is Military Deployment in the family or one is coming up and we worry constantly. Or occasionally, our burden is a wrong that was done to us over the last year, or many, many years ago or perhaps, it’s something we did to another person and we are now shouldering the guilt of our actions. Real situations; real life!

Here’s the amazing part. It is virtually impossible not to find something good in even the most challenging of situations. It’s difficult to see sometimes, but it’s always there. My own personal belief is that we can not control what is done to us, our individual tests and challenges by others, Nature, and our God, but we always have a choice in how we react to those tests and challenges.

It appears as basic as acceptance of the things we can not change and a quiet determination to rise above our adversities as a stronger and wiser person. It is also our opportunity to act both honorably and responsibly not only for ourselves but for others while we find our way. Very simply, it’s Integrity… or doing the right thing regardless of the outcome. Sometimes it is difficult, but we can accomplish it.

Choice is what separates humans from other mammals; that’s empowering. Even if we personally fail in one test or challenge…a new one will come along in which we get to choose all over again. Maybe, it’s so we finally get it correct. Life, as given, isn’t easy. Often, we do not like the apparent choices as they are presented to us and sometimes, they seem unfair, but they are choices nonetheless.

With each and every positive choice we make for ourselves and towards others, we further define who we are as Human Beings and make the world a better place. Every day we are given this opportunity to perfect ourselves. It is an absolutely liberating thought and practice. We are not defined by what has been done to us in the past, but instead we are what we have chosen to do for ourselves… both now and in the future.

What is amazing about our time here on Earth is that with each positive action we choose, we have the opportunity to leave our own Human Footprint in time.

Let this be the time that our lives aren’t so much about what we have…or what we’ve lost, but rather what we’ve given and therefore found.

Sue

The writing below has been read by thousands and it still touches my soul. It was published a few weeks before Christmas a few years ago. The emails that I received then and still do in its regard are so heartfelt and touching.

It seems that we often get caught up in the dynamics of everyday living; so, we forget that the simplest gifts and kindnesses, during the holiday season, are the ones most appreciated and remembered by others. This year we have dealt with the deadliest of World Crisis; the Covid Pandemic. Also, there have been the aftermath attacks following the Presidential Election of “protests” … followed by riots in Missouri, New York, and California et al. regarding basic differences among how we view decisions in life, it seems this piece might be relevant , yet again.

I grew up in New York and taught high school/college for the majority of my career in New Jersey and then… Charleston, S.C. after I read an ad in a prominent northeastern newspaper that read: ” Teach in one of America’s most beautiful cities, the unteachable, the unreachable. My blood ran cold. The northeastern geographic area, I believe, helped mold me for the challenges/ tests of teaching. I speak softly, but carry a very big stick. Hurting others is never o.k., but giving of oneself … even if it’s done with NY/NJ attitude… is the norm. There have been many requests to “repost” this particular Blog. As we leap full force into the holiday preparations and festivities, let us all strive to love and do unto others in thought, word, and deed… not just in physical gifts.

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Christmas is for love. It is for joy, for giving and sharing, for laughter, for reuniting with family and friends, for tinsel and brightly decorated packages. But mostly, Christmas is for love. I lose sight of this, sometimes. We all do. Before I left teaching , one of my students… a student with wide, innocent eyes and a soft, gentle laugh gave me a wondrous gift for Christmas. Jamal (I will call him that), was a fourteen year old student who lived with his aunt, a very bitter woman, greatly annoyed with the burden of caring for her dead sister’s son. She never failed to remind Jamal , if it hadn’t been for her generosity, he would be homeless . Still, with all the scolding and abuse at home, he was a sweet and gentle young man.

I had not paid any singular attention to Jamal, until he began staying after school each day (at the risk of arousing his aunt’s anger, I later found out) to help me straighten up the room. We did this quietly and comfortably, not speaking much, but enjoying the solitude of that hour of the day. When we did talk, Jamal spoke to me mostly of his mother. Though he had been quite young when she died, he remembered a kind, gentle, loving woman, who always spent time with him.

As Christmas drew near however, Jamal failed to stay after school with me. It was clear to me that I had looked forward to his coming after school. When many days passed and he still continued to leave hurriedly from the room, at the end of class, I stopped him in the hall one afternoon. I merely asked him why he no longer helped me in the classroom.

I told him how I had missed him, and his large, brown eyes lit up eagerly as he replied, “Did you really miss me?” I explained that he had been my “best helper” … ever! “I am making you a surprise,” he whispered confidentially. “It’s for Christmas.” With that, he became embarrassed and dashed from my classroom door. He didn’t stay after school anymore … continuing to rush out of my room, each time he had class with me.

Finally, came the last school day before Christmas Vacation. Jamal crept slowly into the room, late that afternoon, after the buses had already left. He had his hands concealing something behind his back. “I have your present,” he said shyly… when I looked up. “I hope you like it.” He held out his hands and there lying in his large palms was a tiny, wooden box. “It’s beautiful, Jamal. Is there something in it that I should see?” I asked, opening the top to look inside.

“Oh, you can’t see what’s in it,” he replied, “and you can’t touch it, or taste it, or feel it, but it will make you feel good all the time. It will make you safe, ’cause you said you live all alone… and I worry about you.” At the time, I was single.

I gazed into the empty box. “What is it, Jamal,” I asked gently, “that will make me feel so good?” “It’s love,” he whispered softly, “and my mother always said it’s best when you give it away.” He turned and quietly left my room.

Since then, I have kept a small box, that is made of scraps of wood on the mantle in my living room and only smile as inquiring friends raise quizzical eyebrows… when I explain to them that there is love in it.

Yes, Christmas is for celebration, parties, and laughter. It’s also a time for wondrous gifts. But mostly, Christmas is for love. Perhaps, we can all be Jamal and give each other love and understanding this year.

Thank you, Jamal; I have never forgotten you.

Twas the night before Christmas and Santa’s a wreck… 

how to live in a world that’s politically correct? 

His workers no longer would answer to “Elves,”

“Vertically Challenged” they were calling themselves. 

Labor conditions at the North Pole, 

were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul. 

Four reindeer had vanished without much propriety, they were

released to the wilds, by the Humane Society. 

 Equal Employment had made it quite clear, that Santa had better not use just reindeer. 

Then Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid were

replaced with four pigs, and you know that was just stupid! 

The metal runners had been removed from Santa’s beautiful sleigh, 

because the ruts were deemed dangerous by the EPA, 

And millions of people were calling the Cops, 

when they heard sled noises upon their roof tops. 

Second-hand smoke from his pipe had his workers quite frightened, 

and his real fur trimmed, red suit was called “unenlightened.” 

To show you the strangeness of today’s ebbs and flows, 

Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose. 

He went to Fox News, in front of the Nation where he

demanded millions in over-due Workers’ Compensation. 

So… half of the reindeer were gone, and then his wife 

 suddenly said she’d had “enough of this life” and

joined a self help group, packed, and left in a whiz, 

demanding from now on that her title was Ms. 

And as for gifts… why, he’d never had the notion 

that making a choice could cause such commotion. 

Nothing of leather, nothing of fur… 

Which meant nothing for him or nothing for her. 

Nothing to aim, nothing to shoot, 

nothing that clamored or made lots of noise. 

Nothing for just girls and nothing for just boys, 

nothing that claimed to be gender specific or

nothing that’s warlike or non-pacifistic. 

No candy or sweets… they were bad for the teeth. 

Nothing that seemed to embellish upon the truth. 

And fairy tales… while not yet forbidden, 

were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden, 

for they raised the hackles of those psychological, 

who claimed the only good gift was one ecological. 

No baseball, no football… someone might get hurt, 

besides – playing sports exposed kids to, ugh, dirt!

Dolls were said to be sexist and should be passe 

and video games would rot your brain away. 

Poor Santa just stood there, disheveled and perplexed, 

he just couldn’t figure out what to do next? 

He tried to be merry, he tried to be gay, 

but you must have to admit he was having a very bad day. 

His sack was quite empty, it was flat on the ground, 

nothing fully acceptable was anywhere to be found. 

Something special was needed, a gift that he might, 

give to us all, without angering the left… or the right. 

A gift that would satisfy – with no indecision, 

Every group of peoples … in every religion. 

Every race, every hue, 

Everyone, Everywhere …

Yup, even you! 

So, here is that gift, it’s price beyond worth… 

Couldn’t we all use… Peace on Earth!Report this

CONTEMPT! IS ANYONE GUILT FREE?

I am wondering, actually suggesting, that what WE ALL GIVE UP DURING THIS COVID-CHALLENGE … IS CONTEMPT.  The Oxford English Dictionary defines “contempt” as “the feeling that a person or a thing is worthless or beneath consideration.” We will see for ourselves if either, ( yes, I did say “either”) Candidate for the President of the United States follows my suggestion. Hmmm. I should call them.

It is ultimately derived from the Latin word contemptus which means “to scorn or despise.” As ONE PEOPLE we seem to be doing this quite frequently and more so each day. We actually have contempt of another! It matters little whether it is politics (Dems vs Rep), among races (Black vs White), nationalities (Americans vs China)… it just goes on and on ad nauseam. Enough already!

 I still get a kick out of my old-school Latin and how often our Modern Society defers to it. As written in The New York Times, contempt is not the same thing as strongly disagreeing with someone. Not only are strong disagreements inevitable, but “Disagreement helps us innovate, improve, and find the truth.” It also leads to common understanding and new ideas. The problem isn’t that we disagree; it’s how we disagree. Increasingly, disagreements today are characterized by a “noxious brew of anger and disgust,” which is directed not only at bad ideas, but also at the people who espouse them. Mmmm…This goes beyond incivility and it’s just plain rudeness.

 It even goes beyond intolerance. It’s the conviction that while your side “is driven by benevolence,” the other side “is evil and motivated by hatred.”  Who does this help?  No one! You can probably think of several examples of contempt recently directed at Christians and Minorities. So can I. However, to paraphrase the First Letter of John, if we say that we are free of contempt, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 

That’s worth a long thought.

Can we honestly say that we never think of our opponents, in any area, as: not quite as informed, educated, or forward thinking as we are?  Do we always strive to be “greater than thou” with people while we criticize their ideas?  The fact that we  ourselves are often unjustly maligned… isn’t a reason to reciprocate in kind.

These are the mechanisms and media trends for modern propaganda and word peddlers.  They are  folks who “profit from the culture of contempt.” They pump up the outrage in our country and you can almost hear the ego rise with every page view and “like.” Of course, this isn’t easy when so much is at stake in our culture.

Come on Political Parties, “Put your big boy pants on” and play fair! It’s only the U.S. or “us” at stake; it’s never been a “you” thing. Ever!

     As an adult, I am neither conservative or prudish; that’s a given. I LOVE people! Working with, and teaching, teens and college students for two decades has always kept me “up” with what’s going on in our culture. It still does and I’m guessing it will always be so.  Perhaps, my caring and deep love for people, but especially the youth, has given me an even stronger sense of moral and ethical… right and wrong.  This is the future of America.  As the youth go and do… our country either prospers and flourishes or fails.   Sadly, many of the things I see put on the Internet by America’s Youth and now adults, are either morally or ethically… just plain wrong!

     I often wonder how many of us would have become better people or have accomplished more with our lives if we had  “walked away” from things that were unhealthy during our lives, thus far.  There are so many things that are “unhealthy” for us, that I believe we are not even aware of the long term repercussions, until it’s too late to make corrections.  The Internet provides the new positive as well as the new unhealthy. Isn’t it “cool” to do so many things today, that once were thought not cool? It appears so.

     For some of the best years of my life, I taught young people.  Although it appeared that I was an English teacher/professor…what I really taught was about LIFE!  My message was not subtle; I am not a subtle person.  Life is hard and it requires a steady course to overcome our individual tests and limitations. We are going through the roughest patch in Modern-History with Covid-19. There is so much anger, Depression, nastiness, and wrongful words spoken to others, that it lessens each of us as Human Beings.

 As of late, I am so angered and disappointed by what I see posted by so many people on Facebook, Twitter and many other social media sites.  What you put on today, you  own forever. Forever! This is especially true during this Covid, “stay at home,” shutdown. Now it’s not only the young people, but many adults to who have taken to Social Media to discredit or embarrass another co-worker, neighbor, or friend. Don’t even get me started on all of this Political nonsense; it has gotten more aggressive than ever before.

     Not only are there things being said/done that can never be erased, (once it is on the Internet it can be “recalled” for eternity… I need to repeat that ), but there seems to be great delight in “shocking” the viewers/readers.  You know, EVERYONE can see those postings, right?  Family, employers, teachers…everyone.   I see it as a call for help from younger America.  It is desperation to be noticed…if only in a negative way. From adults, well it’s just plan ignorant and disgusting. Yup, I said that.

     When a person blatantly acts out in words/deeds, whether they are young or older… they are in trouble and need guidance.  I know this from experience and personal involvement.  Excessive drinking and drugs, posing nearly nude or in suggestive sexual positions, excessive self mutilation (be it piercing or body art ), and words/deeds that hurt others are… never signs of a healthy, maturing person.  When it is posted for the world to see, you open yourself up to all kinds of future liability, criticism, and heartache.  Sadly, you are abusing yourself.  I can’t view it any other way.

     I get that all young people test and act out.  However, excessive testing and acting out and then “posting” it on line for the world to see… has dangerous and long lasting repercussions.  Even if your site is marked “private” one of your less scrupulous contacts has theirs wide-open for the world to see and read.  Your “privacy” is their fodder.  Duh!

     If you are someone with a healthy self-image, you don’t need approval or validation from anyone else as to how “cool” you are.  You give yourself honor and integrity by doing good things for yourself and giving generously to others.  Over drinking or doing drugs, body parts with excessive art(?),  eating disorders (too much or too little food; it doesn’t matter), or beating up on others physically or verbally are just scabs on the wounds that will never heal. 

     Do something that you can be proud of and then post it on-line.  The world is watching. You will be pleased not only today, but five and ten years from now as well.  If you are in an unhealthy “space” it stops today.  If you “fly high” with Twitter” then make it worthwhile. Most importantly, if you are working, educating/schooling from home, or “posting” things then make them positive and healing.

DURING THIS PANDEMIC IS THE BEST OF TIME TO REINVENT YOURSELF and MAKE THE WORLD, WORKPLACE, AND RELATIONSHIPS… WELL, HEALTHY! I honestly believe that this is the reason the World was “instructed” to see “clearly now!” It’s 20/20… perfect vision for how we live our lives.

If you need help, ask for it!  You have that choice.  Pretty amazing to be human.  However, do it so you can “face” your choices with pride down the road.

Sue Brown